Joel:
(with concertina) Well aye, me limey buckos. The movie's over, the pain
is passed and I's feel like singing a plot shanty. Be lively, now, me
Bonnie Raitts!
Bots: Arrrr Arrrr
All: (singing)
Ohhh slow the plot down, laddy
Slow the plot down
Way hey
Slow the plot down!
We'll scuttle the story and run her aground
We'll try so hard to slow the plot down!
Bots: Arrrr
Arrrr
Joel: (spoken) Okay now who can tell me their favorite
scene from the movie so far? Tom?
Tom: Okay, sure. There was the--uh...Arrrr!
(Music starts)
All: (singing)
Ohh slow the plot down, laddy
Slow the plot down
Way hey
Slow the plot down
With German, Italian and Japanese clowns
We'll try so hard to slow the plot down!
Joel: (spoken)
Okay How 'bout you, Crow? You must be full to bursting with some fond
memories of today's movie. Come on think hard!
Tom: Arrrr!
Crow: Huh? Oh. Uh...ummm...Ahh, jeez, Joel! I'm drawing
a blank!
Tom: Yeah, me too.
Crow: Oh, I remember vaguely a guy...locked in a room
with another guy...and...someone...running. Arrrr!
(music starts)
All: (singing)
We'll make you a movie that's long immense
Way hey
Slow the plot down
Just give us a script that makes no friggin' sense
We'll try so hard to slow the plot down
Joel: (spoken)
Well, c'mon you guys! I can remember--I, for one, in vivid detail, A frogman
who--uh...Just who IS Mighty Jack, anyway?
Crow: Arrrr!
Tom: Oh, wow! It just hit me! The scene where Quequeg
sits motionless on the deck, meditating, foretelling the death of the
crew...
Crow: Yeah! And Scout sees Atticus shoot the mad dog
in the street and Alice Ghostly--
Joel: I remember! Patrick Swayze walks in and says
All: It's MY way or the highway! Arrrr Arrrr Arrrr
Joel: C'mon you guys...
Crow: Oh My brain hurts
Tom: Oh, Joel I'm so confused
Joel: It's really not that bad, you guys. I, for one,
actually feel like I just got done listening to two hours of Lou Reed's
'Metal Machine Music' You know my brain feels clean as a whistle!
Crow: (as Rommel from Sidehackers) And that’s pretty
good!
Tom: That’s not half bad! Let’s take it home.
All: (singing)
So slow the plot down, laddies
Slow the plot down
Way hey
Slow the plot down
Just scuttle the story and run her aground
We'll try so hard to slow the plot down!
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