Beating Around the Bush

A column with Cathy Stubbs

Mid-life crisis

My husband thinks I've completely lost it.

I can tell by that incredulous look he gives me when I announce another of my crazy schemes to learn to fly, go white water rafting, or try bungy jumping.

At first I thought I actually had lost possession of my faculties, when I was suddenly seized by the urge to get fit and dye my hair another colour, when previously it had never mattered to me.

But, of course, I am not really mad, just on the cusp of middle age, and feeling that restless, overpowering urge to forge ahead to who knows where. It happens to mostly everyone, so I am reliably informed, and I do seem to remember my mother "going off" a bit when I was in my teens. I suppose that is life. Just when you feel as though all is running smoothly, life backs you into that metaphorical corner and dares you to find an escape route.

Of course, I understand that not everyone goes through the crisis of midlife, and it certainly appears that the biggest crisis my husband is currently facing is me, and his inability to get that golf handicap down under seven.

When I announced that I would be learning to skydive at the end of March, he looked surprised, but said that was fine with him. When I told him I would be joining a friend on a two week bike ride for charity some time in 1999, he just snickered and said I would have the sorest butt this side of the black stump.

I only really began to realise his view of life and mine were not currently in sync when I announced that I wished to travel to Tibet, a dream I have harboured with clear and constant longing since childhood.

"Mark, I want to go to Tibet," I announced.

"Hmmmm? What did you say," he answered, barely looking up from his book.

"I want to go to Tibet," I repeated.

This time he did look up, quite startled.

"But it's the middle of the day, and I'm a bit tired," he said.

I didn't get it. What was he talking about?

"But, well, if you really feel like it...I suppose I could..."

Suddenly it dawned. We were talking at cross purposes. I was thinking of a pilgrimage in search of enlightenment and knowledge and he was thinking of a journey of a much shorter kind.

He thought I had said "I want to go to BED".

God, no wonder he was surprised!

And the moral of this tale, if you are going to have a midlife crisis, be careful about which overseas destination takes your fancy. You could end up getting more (or less) than you bargained for!

If you like Cathy's article, why not tell her?

Back

Back to Johanna's Page

Page designed by Johanna Vagg ··· you can email me too!