Your Jokes Pg. 2
QUESTION: What do you call a blonde with
half a brain?
ANSWER: Gifted!
(sent in by Cowboys)
A mother and her young son returned from the grocery
store and began putting away the groceries. The boy opened the box of
animal crackers and spread them all over the table. "What are you
doing?" his mother asked."
"The box says you can't eat them if the seal is
broken" the boy explained. "I'm looking for the seal."
(sent in by Joseph White, Indiana USA)
A blonde decides to try riding horseback, even
though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse
unassisted and the horse immediately springs into motion. It gallops along
at a steady pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In
terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm
grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides
down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly
oblivious to its slipping rider. Finally, giving up her frail grip, she
leaps away from the horse and tries to throw herself to safety.
Unfortunately, her foot has become entangled in the stirrup and she is now
at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head strikes the ground
over and over again.
As her head is battered against the ground, she is
mere moments away from unconsciousness when - fortunately the Supermarket
manager sees her and turns off the horse.
(sent in by Danny Lanthois, Adelaide
AUS)
The Alaska Department of Fish and Game, recently
issued this bulletin:
In light of the rising frequency of human/grizzly
bear conflicts, the Alaska Department of Fish and Game is advising hikers,
hunters, and fishermen to take extra precautions and keep alert of bears
while in the field. "We advise outdoorsmen to wear noisy little bells
on their clothing so as not to startle bears that aren't expecting them.
We also advise outdoorsmen to carry pepper spray with them in case of an
encounter with a bear.It is also a good idea to watch out for fresh signs
of bear activity. Outdoorsmen should recognize the difference between
black bear and grizzly bear manure:
Black bear manure is smaller and contains lots of
berries and squirrel fur.
Grizzly bear manure has little bells in it and
smells like pepper."
(sent in by Joseph White, Indiana USA)
<-- Go Back
Return to Top
|
